Jennifer Lopez revealed that her now-husband Ben Affleck was the one to make the first move in rekindling their love.
“Obviously we weren’t trying to go out in public. But I never shied away from the fact that for me, I always felt like there was a real love there, a true love there,” the singer told Vogue in her November cover story, published Tuesday.
”People in my life know that he was a very, very special person in my life. When we reconnected, those feelings for me were still very real.”
Lopez, 53, said that Affleck, 50, emailed her after his split from Ana De Armas to let her know he had raved about her in an interview. From there, they kept talking and they started hanging out.
The “Let’s Get Loud” singer noted that reconnecting with an ex isn’t always a good idea, however.
“I don’t know that I recommend this for everybody,” she told the magazine. “Sometimes you outgrow each other, or you just grow differently.”
Lopez explained that she and Affleck “lost each other” and then “found each other” again.
“Not to discredit anything in between that happened, because all those things were real too,” she elaborated. “All we’ve ever wanted was to kind of come to a place of peace in our lives where we really felt that type of love that you feel when you’re very young and wonder if you can have that again. Does it exist? Is it real? All those questions that I think everyone has.”
She continued, “You go through all these relationships, and you’re searching and you’re connecting and you’re disconnecting with people, and you’re like, ‘God, is this just what life is? Like a carousel, roller coaster, carnival ride?’ And then it settles. But the journey to that is the mystery for everybody.”
Lopez, who called off her engagement to Alex Rodriguez amid cheating rumors prior to reuniting with Affleck, also reflected on how she’s working on herself to recover from failed relationships in the past.
“I have to forgive myself for the things that I did that I’m not proud of, the choices that I made that worked against me,” she said. “Self-love is really about boundaries. Learning what you’re comfortable with and putting up the boundaries, not being afraid of the consequences.”
The “Hustlers” actress added that the best way to make sure things work out is to “take care” of yourself.
“Knowing that in taking care of yourself, everything will turn out OK, that people will treat you the way you want to be treated and your life will feel good to you,” she said. “For a long time, I was just like, ‘Yes, do whatever you want! I can take it, I’ll be here, because I’m really strong, and I’ll be fine.’ Little by little, it chips away at your self-worth, your self-esteem, your soul.”
Lopez tied the knot with Affleck in July 2022 in Las Vegas and again at his Georgia estate in August. She said that blending their families has been a “process.”
The singer shares 14-year-old twins, Max and Emme, with ex-husband Marc Anthony, while Affleck and his ex-wife, Jennifer Garner, share three kids: Violet, 16, Seraphina, 13, and Samuel, 10.
Lopez called Affleck “an amazing co-parent” and said they “work really well together,” but that their teen children are still adjusting.
“The transition is a process that needs to be handled with so much care,” Lopez said. “They have so many feelings. They’re teens. But it’s going really well so far.”
She continued, “What I hope to cultivate with our family is that his kids have a new ally in me and my kids have a new ally in him, someone who really loves and cares about them but can have a different perspective and help me see things that I can’t see with my kids because I’m so emotionally tied up.”
Lopez and Affleck got engaged for the second time in April. The pair, dubbed “Bennifer,” initially started dating in 2002 and showcased their love with plenty of PDA.
In November of that year, Affleck proposed with a 6.1-carat Harry Winston pink diamond ring that reportedly cost $2.5 million.
But massive media attention surrounding their engagement caused tension for the couple and they postponed their 2003 wedding. By 2004, Lopez and Affleck ended things, and she married Anthony by June of the same year.
Meanwhile, Affleck married Garner in 2005. Both Affleck and Lopez went on to welcome children with their respective spouses before things ended in divorce.
Lopez then moved on with Rodriguez while Affleck briefly dated De Armas. But when things ended for Lopez and the former MLB pro in 2021, Affleck swiftly swooped in and the pair have been going strong ever since.