Super Nintendo World in Los AngelesPhoto: CHRIS DELMAS/AFP via Getty Images
It’s a classic theological question: Could Bowser (the Koopa King) create a theme park ride so restrictive that even he couldn’t ride it?
Said question is front and center for plenty of Nintendo fans this week, with new reports that the upcoming Mario Kart ride, Bowser’s Challenge—set to be the main draw (and only actual ride) at Universal Studio’s new Super Nintendo World—will only accommodate riders with a 40-inch waistline or smaller. This is per our colleagues over at Kotaku, who report on a number of people raising issues online this week about Universal’s decision to impose the size limits.
Mario Kart: Bowser’s Challenge at SUPER NINTENDO WORLD Opens Early 2023
An import from the Japanese version of Super Mario Land, Bowser’s Challenge is what’s known as “dark ride,” i.e., one of those space-efficient, thrill-deficient arrangements where you’re strapped into a car and then swerved on a track in front of a bunch of 3D screens and actual live elements. (In this case, lifted from Nintendo’s beloved Mario Kart franchise.) As such, it’s not entirely clear why such tight size restrictions are being imposed; certainly, it seems like some alternative solution could be used. (Disney, for instance, tends to use benches and lap-bars for this sort of thing, which accommodates a much wider variety of body types.)
The 40-inch waistline requirement is fairly standard at Universal Studios, where it’s also applied to dark rides like Harry Potter And The Forbidden Journey and Revenge Of The Mummy: The Ride. From personal experience, this 6′, 4″, 290-pound writer will note that there is some wiggle room on those requirements when you’re actually at the park—but also that the process of forcing yourself into those seats (or using the tester seat provided, as with Mario Kart) can be both uncomfortable and embarrassing. More to the point, it all feels profoundly unnecessary: There’s no reason for Universal not to update its sizing on rides to allow a more diverse group of riders to enjoy the Super Nintendo Land fun, especially as the opening of the new area has drawn renewed interest and attention to the park.
Booster Gold (Hi-Fi/DC Comics), Superman (Jim Lee/DC Comics), Damian Wayne (Frank Quitely/DC Comics)Graphic: The A.V. Club
When Warner Bros. tapped James Gunn and Peter Safran to run DC Studios, we expected they’d draw a new roadmap for the turbulent comics-to-film universe. Now that they’ve revealed plans for their upcoming projects, we have our first sense of what the map looks like, at least for the near future. This first chapter, which Gunn and Safran are calling “Gods and Monsters,” will include 10 new film and TV projects. Gunn and Safran have said they intend to focus on screenwriting and allowing other creators to put their stamp on familiar characters as well as more obscure ones from the comics.
These titles will exist in their own corner of the DC universe, distinct from upcoming releases that predate Gunn and Safran’s tenure. Still to come this year are Shazam! Fury Of The Gods on March 17, The Flash on June 16, Blue Beetle on Aug. 18, and Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom on Dec. 25. Once those are cleared from the slate, the pair expect to launch two films and two series per year from 2024 on. The only DC projects that have broad release dates so far are Superman: Legacy and The Batman: Part II, both due in 2025. Read on for a complete list of all the newly announced titles.
Taylor Swift in “Lavender Haze”Screenshot: Taylor Swift/YouTube
In the “Anti-Hero” music video, Taylor Swift poked fun at her fans for looking for Easter eggs everywhere (and at herself for leaving them). In the “Bejeweled”video, she crammed every scene full of them. The new “Lavender Haze” video falls somewhere in the middle, mostly existing behind a purple smokescreen in one of her most seductive visuals yet.
“The Lavender Haze video is out now. There is lots of lavender. There is lots of haze. There is my incredible costar [Laith Ashley] who I absolutely adored working with,” Swift shared on social media at the time of the video’s release. “This was the first video I wrote out of the 3 that have been released, and this one really helped me conceptualize the world and mood of Midnights, like a sultry sleepless 70’s fever dream. Hope you like it.”
Taylor Swift – Lavender Haze (Official Music Video)
The video is characterized by some classic Swiftian heavy-handed visual metaphor (a literal gray cloud hangs over her head while she sings how her lover doesn’t “really read into my melancholia”). She puffs a cloud of lavender smoke in the shape of a clock striking midnight; she bathes alluringly in a lavender pool; she enjoys her cosmic love bubble while partygoers gossip and dance around her.
A certain subset of fans will point out, quite fairly, that lavender has had a longtime association with queerness, though aside from her trans co-star, this video has far fewer nods to the LGBTQ+ community than the bonanza that was “You Need To Calm Down.” (Swift previously said she lifted the term “lavender haze” from Mad Men.) Other fans are on the watch for signs pointing to Speak Now (Taylor’s Version) being Swift’s next release. The koi fish gliding through space, for instance, may point to a guitar she played on the Speak Now tour, and even the color purple has an association with her third album.
More than anything else, this video’s Easter eggs refer back to the Midnights album itself. There’s an incense stick for “Maroon” and a vinyl record emblazoned with “Mastermind” (the constellations on the cover correspond with Sagittarius and Pisces, apparently the star signs of Swift and her longtime boyfriend Joe Alwyn). The weather report may be a subtle reference to “Midnight Rain,” while the video’s love interest appears as the TV meteorologist recalls the lyric “Karma is the guy on the screen coming straight home to me” from “Karma.”
G/O Media may get a commission
Officially-licensed socks Sock Affairs wants you to enrobe your feet in their officially licensed socks with art from Pink Floyd and AC/DC records.
It’s the continuation of Swift’s work becoming a closed loop wherein everything is a reference to itself. Though for an artist whose visuals tend towards romance and whimsy, “sultry” is indeed a departure from the norm. Perhaps a new evolution of Taylor Swift is on the horizon.
Look, everyone wants to play Spider-Man. It’s perhaps any actor’s most sought-after role behind Hamlet and The Joker. To prove yourself as a young Hollywood A-lister, you better start learning the phrase, “With great power comes great responsibility.”
One actor who would love to play Spider-Man is Tobey Maguire, an actor who has played Spider-Man four times. After playing Spider-Man throughout the 2000s, he donned the mask one more time for 2021’s Spider-Man: No Way Home. For those counting at home, we have now said the name “Spider-Man” five times in this article.
“When they called initially, I was like, finally!” Maguire said in an interview with, ahem, Marvel. “I got the call and was immediately open about coming to do this. Not without nerves–you know, ‘What will this look like, and what will the experience be?’ But to get to show up with beautiful, talented, creative people and play together? It’s just like, ‘Yes!’ It’s fun and exciting.”
“I love these films, and I love all of the different series. If these guys called me and said, ‘Would you show up tonight to hang out and goof around?’ or ‘Would you show up to do this movie or read a scene or do a Spider-Man thing?’ It would be a ‘yes!’ Because why wouldn’t I want to do that?”
Maguire doesn’t appear on screen much these days, outside of going pure goblin mode in Babylon. Seeing as that movie didn’t do so hot; it makes sense that he’d tell Marvel that, yes, he’d love another job, especially if he has to “read a scene” or “do a Spider-Man thing” or simply hang out in the background of scenes until the other Spider-Men are ready for a hug. Fellow Spider-Man Andrew Garfield is also open to more, so we look forward to the Marvel Cinematic Universe becoming even more unwieldy, confusing, and laden with crossovers. Excelsior!
G/O Media may get a commission
Officially-licensed socks Sock Affairs wants you to enrobe your feet in their officially licensed socks with art from Pink Floyd and AC/DC records.
The Bachelor’sZach Shallcross Photo: ABC/Nino Muñoz
The premiere of a new season of The Bachelor—two hours of being waterboarded by workout montages and wannabe influencers professing their love for a man they haven’t even met yet—is always a little bit of a mindfuck. Our new bachelor is Zach Shallcross, and the recurring line of the contestants’ gushing intros was that he has “kind eyes.” Several of the women also refer to themselves as “the future Mrs. Shallcross,” which does not exactly roll off the tongue.
“Some people are saying, ‘Why me?’” Zach admits in his voiceover. It’s a fair question, one that I have asked. Host Jesse Palmer says they chose him because “he’s just a genuine guy who came here looking for love and love alone.” Sure, Jan. Zach is as bland and generic as most of the men who have filled the Bachelor shoes before him—the kind of guy who says “freakin’”—but he does have one wrinkle of interest (at least, of interest to me): He’s related to David Puddy.
If you don’t remember this from Zach’s unremarkable run in that last season of The Bachelorette, I’ll refresh your memory. On his hometown date, his Uncle Pat spoke in strikingly deep voice that made me look up from my phone and say, “Is that David Puddy?” Yes! Zach’s uncle is Patrick Warburton, who played Elaine’s on-again-off-again boyfriend on Seinfeld. This was never addressed in the show but lives rent-free in my mind. I was hoping for a full segment with Uncle Pat in the premiere. Alas, he does not show up.
We do get an advice session from Sean Lowe, literally the one man in the history of the show who is still with his selected winner. I will admit I am a sucker for Sean Lowe and the blank way he smiles like a human golden retriever. His season (all the way back in 2013, yikes) was the first time I watched The Bachelor, and you never forget your first. Why isn’t he hosting this show now?
G/O Media may get a commission
Up to $100 credit
Samsung Reserve
Reserve the next gen Samsung device All you need to do is sign up with your email and boom: credit for your preorder on a new Samsung device.
The producers clearly want us to connect Zach with Sean. He’s ready to settle down! He wants a family! He’s a Good Guy™! Five minutes into the episode, my three-year-old got out of bed to go to the bathroom and then called down that he had pooped and needed me to come wipe his butt. Are you really ready to settle down, Zach? Are you ready to be responsible for wiping someone else’s butt?
The final line from Zach before we transition to meet the women: “Do I deserve this? I don’t know.” Perfect. No notes.
We then meet a lot of nurses and content creators and medical sales reps in their mid-twenties. Zach has already met five of them on After The Final Rose, a detail I didn’t remember because my brain refuses to retain information about The Bachelor for longer than three months. One of them, Briana, already has a rose (referred to as “America’s rose”), so she’s safe. Another, Bailey, tried to get him to remember her name by rhyming Bailey with daily, and he then called her Bailen. For the rest of the episode, my husband referred to her as either Balon Greyjoy (Game Of Thrones) or Balin (The Hobbit).
There’s also Christina, who has a five-year-old and seems like a potential villain; rodeo girl Brooklyn; and family therapist Charity. It’s hard to come off great in an intro video unless you’ve survived a tragedy or work with children. Onto the limo entrances!
The first car pulls up and the girls all scream “Zach!” at the top of their lungs before chanting, “I am beautiful. I am confident. I am strong.” in unison like they’re holding a séance. First out is Jess, who is so adorable she looks like she could play a 15-year-old in a CW show. Her lack of hair extensions and severe contouring makes me want to root for her, which is how the producers want me to feel. “Great smile, very pretty,” Zach says to himself as she walks into the house. I know they make him do this for narration purposes, but it still feels extremely weird.
There are some normal entrances, but then we suffer through the usual gimmicks. Someone makes him drink maple syrup. Another looks at his crotch and says she knows everything is bigger in Texas. One girl brings a pig; Christina arrives on a party bus; Vanessa walks out to New Orleans trumpets. They all blend together. Bailey (Balon/Balin) reminds him about that time he forgot her name, and it gets worse because they suffer through one of the most awkward first kisses I had ever seen on this show. He promises to remember her name, but how funny would it have been if he had yelled, “See you later, Brenda!” as she walked in?
Briana is the last to arrive, and she’s wearing a stunning red dress covered in roses to match the rose she already has. Good branding, Briana. Zach says he likes her confidence, not understanding how easy it is for a woman to project confidence when she feels secure. Once she’s inside, Jesse pops up to ask Zach if he feels like he just met his wife. He says, “No, actually, do you have any more?” Just kidding. He actually says, “My gut is telling me…I might have.”
Zach enters the mansion to address his group of 30 women and begins with, “I’m just a dude who loves family, football, and frozen pizzas.” It’s made so much worse by the fact that he clearly rehearsed this speech and determined that was a winning opening line. The rest could have been cut and pasted from any other opening Bachelor toast, and then the night is a blur of awkward get-to-know-you gimmicks and first kisses. Zach and Katherine bond over how they’re both “weird,” and is there anything worse than two hot people insisting that they’re actually huge weirdos? Christina lures him onto the party bus for a game of compatibility questions, including the critical “dinosaurs or dragons?” (Zach prefers dragons, which disappoints Christina.) One woman makes him demonstrate his future dad bona fides by changing the diaper on a baby doll, which looks possessed. Get that thing in the M3GAN sequel.
His first impression rose goes to Greer, who made the incredible play of talking about how much she wants to settle down in Austin, the city in which he resides. Their kiss evolves into a make out session that prompts the funniest moment of the night. “Who is it?” someone asks as they try to get a look at who Zach is kissing. “It’s that girl!” another woman yells.
Photo: ABC
Because this episode has to follow the same beats of every premiere, someone must fill the crazy role, and that someone is Madison. They have a normal conversation, but her obsession with getting the first impression rose causes her to pull him a second time and go in for a kiss they both instantly recognize as horrible. “I’ll let you go,” Zach says to end their conversation in the same way I do when I’m on the phone with someone I no longer wish to speak to. Madison spends the rest of the night spiraling until confronting Zach right before the rose ceremony, forcing him to dump her minutes earlier than he would have anyway. “I cannot believe I gave up my life for him!” she sobs to the producers in the driveway. Girl.
It’s finally time for the rose ceremony and it is fully noon the next day. The sun is high in the sky as he hands out the roses. The people who go home are ones we are not invested in, surprise! Once they’ve gone, Zach says he’s here to find his best friend, which is clearly going to be the mantra of the season. I hope Zach’s actual best friend—probably some dude named Mike he’s known since high school—is mildly annoyed every time it comes up.
Stray observations
I’m going to need them to stop calling him “Zach the Snack.”
In his intro, Jesse says, “Of course, the driveway has been hosed down.” Is that what they do? Is that a thing people do?
As I prepared to make the point that the Bachelor is always forgettable, it took me at least 30 seconds to remember who the last Bachelor actually was. Remember Clayton?
“What are you drinking?” someone asks Madison after her bad kiss with Zach. “Not enough.” No, it’s definitely enough! Someone cut her off!
Kimberly tries to comfort Madison by saying her makeup is on fleek, a term I haven’t heard someone use since 2015.
Jesse tells Zach, “A lot went down tonight.” Did it? No one revealed a boyfriend back home. No one brought a playbook. No one even got in a fight! It was an extremely normal, uneventful night, Jesse!
Adam Rich, the former child star who played youngest sibling Nicholas Bradford on the ’70s sitcom Eight Is Enough, died at his home on Saturday, per the Associated Press. He was 54 years old.
Best known for his role on ABC’s Eight Is Enough, Rich also made appearances on other television series throughout the ’80s and ’90s, including The Love Boat, The Six Million Dollar Man, St. Elsewhere, and Baywatch. His last major role occurred in 2003, when he played himself in the David Spade comedy Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star.
Rich suffered from addiction issues that contributed to legal trouble over the years, including an arrest in 1991 for attempting to break into a pharmacy, per the AP. He was open about his experiences with mental illness; publicist Danny Deraney told the outlet that the actor’s depression “defied treatment.”
“Adam was simply a wonderful guy. He was kind, generous and a warrior in the fight against mental illness,” Deraney shared in a statement posted to Twitter. “Adam did not have an ounce of ego. He was unselfish and always looked out for those he cared about. Which is why many people who grew up with him feel a part of their childhood gone, and sad today. He really was Americas Little Brother.”
Rich’s television brother Willie Aames posted his own remembrance to Facebook (per People), writing, “This morning [my wife] Winnie woke me with the heartbreaking news of Adam Rich’s passing. I’m gutted. Adam was more than a colleague. He was very much my only little brother. A lifelong friend.”
G/O Media may get a commission
$50 off preorder
Ring Car Cam
It’s a camera. For your car. The Ring Car Cam’s dual-facing HD cameras capture activity in and around your car in HD detail.
“These last few years Adam had dreams of renewing his career. He was one of those kid actors that our generation will always remember. I can’t tell you how many parents have told me they named their first child ‘Nicolas’ after his Eight Is Enough character,” Aames wrote. “The diminishing fraternity of kids that grew up in the golden years of family television has lost another of our own. I will miss him deeply. Rest ‘A.R.’ You were the cutest TV kid of them all.”
Betty Buckley, who played the Bradfords’ stepmother on Eight Is Enough, also posted a tribute to her co-star. “Adam Rich was a light and my young pal for the four seasons I was blessed to work with him on Eight Is Enough. I adored him and loved working with him in our scenes together on the show. He was so sweet, funny, fresh and natural,” she shared in an Instagram post.
“He brought a lot of joy to all of us on the show and to our audiences,” Buckley continued. “Adam and I have remained friends all of these years. His love and support have always meant a lot to me. I am shocked by the news I received this morning of his death. Sending my love and deepest condolences to his friends and family. In recent years Adam dedicated himself to providing inspiration for others with mental and emotional illness. I will miss him greatly.”
Morrissey in 2013Photo: Chris Jackson/Getty Images for Nobel Peace Prize Concert
Bad news for Morrissey fans: Morrissey is in the news again (it’s always bad when that happens). This time, rather than saying or doing something awful (oh hey, maybe this is good news), ol’ Moz simply announced on the official Morrissey website that Miley Cyrus has requested to be removed from a track called “I Am Veronica” for the still-unreleased album Bonfire Of Teenagers. Cyrus apparently recorded backing vocals for the song years ago, but the only indication we have for why this is happening now is that the website notes that it “comes at a time when Morrissey has disassociated himself with Capitol Records [Los Angeles], who control the hidden album Bonfire Of Teenagers”—the implication being that the two events are somehow related.
As far as we can tell, Cyrus is with Columbia, so it’s not like she has some special connection to Capitol, so maybe it’s just Morrissey (or a spokesperson?) wallowing in misery a bit. Cyrus has been posting on Instagram a lot with the tagline “New Year, New Miley,” but that’s most likely about her New Year’s Eve thing on NBC and not Morrissey. In our experience, most things are not about Morrissey.
Back to this “hidden album,” though, Bonfire Of Teenagers has had a difficult time getting released even before Cyrus wanted off of it (do you think she Googled “Morrissey” and saw what he’s been up to for the last… few decades?). In 2021, Morrissey said that the album—his “best,” according to him—didn’t have a label at all, but Variety says Capitol eventually came along and had originally planned to put it out in early 2023. Morrissey recently announced that he had “voluntarily withdrawn” from any association with the label, though, so it has been pulled from release.
So what we have here is a situation where people don’t want to work with Morrissey and Morrissey doesn’t want to work with people. Is it good or bad news? A little of both, so we’ll file it under “Could Be Worse News.”
As far as modern occupations go, there are few more insidious and controversial than child actor. Former child star Leelee Kimmel (neé Sobieski) once said she didn’t know “why it’s legal for a child to act,” and called Hollywood a “gross industry” that capitalizes on children’s appearances. A new story from Bella Thorne seems to exemplify her question.
Speaking to Emily Ratajkowski for a new episode of her High Low podcast, the Shake It Up star recalls a specifically memorable audition from her early career as a child actor. According to Thorne, an unnamed male director once reached out to a casting director (who in turn contacted Thorne’s mother) to accuse Thorne of flirting with him and making him “uncomfortable” during a casting session. Thorne was 10 years old at the time.
Needless to say, facing accusations of inappropriate flirting when she was still pre-pubescent left Thorne in disbelief. “’What the fuck are you talking about man?’” she recalls thinking. “I don’t give a fuck what the fuck I said. I don’t care if I said ‘eat my pussy right now.’ She is 10 years old! Why ever would you think that? Why? Why?”
Thorne continues: “You’re in a director session—you can’t really say or do much. You do the scene, you say hello, you walk out. There’s no time to like ‘let me go sit on your lap’ or like make you feel uncomfortable. What the fuck are you talking about?”
Ratajkowski, who has faced her own struggles with Hollywood’s leering and entitled eye, noted both the absurdity of the director’s accusation and the way it exemplifies some of the controversies about child stardom today.
G/O Media may get a commission
“Just putting that on a 10-year-old child and making it like they made an adult man uncomfortable is insane… and then that was relayed to a casting director who was happy to relay that to your mom,” Ratajkowski sums up the vomit-inducing tale. “If you need a more fucked up story about Hollywood and, like, pedophilia and the sexualization of children, I don’t know if there is one.”
James CameronPhoto: Gareth Cattermole (Getty Images)
James Cameron is never going to pass on the opportunity to take a jab at another major franchise, and Stranger Things’ ticket has just been called. The blockbuster director says one of the major motivations behind the back-to-back filming of Avatar 2-4 was to avoid the “Stranger Things effect,” or when your young actors look too old to play children due to the natural aging process.
“Otherwise, you get—and I love Stranger Things—but you get the Stranger Things effect, where they’re supposed to still be in high school [but] they look like they’re 27,” Cameron tells Entertainment Weekly. “You know, I love the show. It’s okay, we’ll suspend disbelief. We like the characters. But, you know.”
His main concern was for Jack Champion—who plays the Spider—who over the course of shooting was “growing like a weed.” Champion snagged the role when he was 12, and wrapped filming the Avatar sequels four years later at 16.
Now, this whole “aging-out” worry seems moot when you’re utilizing technology that enables 73-year-old Sigourney Weaver to play a teenager in The Way Of Water, but sure. Nonetheless, Cameron could not halt Champion’s aging, and even throughout Avatar: The Way Of Water, the changes between the actor from ages 14 and 16 still peek through all those visual effects.
“In some scenes, I’m 14, and then in the next scene, I’m 16,” Champion says in an interview with The Hollywood Reporter. “So I’m like, ‘Wait a second, I look slightly more pudgy.’ And then in another scene, I’m 2 inches taller with abs. It’s a little weird sometimes.”
G/O Media may get a commission
“They did some CGI stuff, but it’s not like they had the anti-aging serum from the movie,” Champion adds. “Puberty just happens, and we had to let it run its course.”
With The Way Of Water swiftly dominating box offices upon its release, those involved in the films are already looking forward to the release of Avatar 3, which has nearly completed shooting principal photography.
“I was very shocked by [Avatar 3]. It just takes a hard left turn, and that’s not a bad thing. You think you know where it’s going, but then a wrecking ball comes,” Champion says of the sequel. “So you’re completely like, ‘Oh wow, I never thought that would’ve happened.’ You also see more regions of Pandora, and you get introduced to more cultures. So I think it’s even better than Avatar 2. Collectively, they’ll each get better.”
We weren’t supposed to know about it, but someone leaked the existence of a Game Of Thronesspin-off over the summer that will focus on Jon Snow, with George R.R. Martin explaining later on that the whole pitch for the spin-off actually came from Jon Snow actor Kit Harington himself—with him bringing in his own people and making his own pitch to HBO, rather than just sitting back and waiting for someone else to say “hey, what if we took the ostensible ‘protagonist’ from one of the biggest TV shows ever and gave him his own show?”
Nobody else has leaked anything about it since then, but Harington did vaguely dance around the idea of continuing Jon Snow’s story at the official Game Of Thrones Convention this weekend, telling the fans in attendance how he felt about where the end of the show left his character. “I think if you asked him, he would’ve felt he got off lightly,” Harington said, referring to Jon being exiled back to The Wall as punishment for killing Daenerys after she went on that dragon rampage, with him adding, “At the end of the show when we find him in that cell, he’s preparing to be beheaded and he wants to be. He’s done. The fact he goes to the Wall is the greatest gift and also the greatest curse.”
The way Harington sees it, it’s good that Jon Snow got to live, but it’s also bad that he has to live forever in the place where he experienced most of the bad stuff that happened to him over the course of the series—Harington specifically mentions the death of Ygritte and when he had to hang Olly for betraying him, but let’s not forget that The Wall is also where he met Westeros’ best best friend, Samwell Tarly, so it wasn’t all bad. Still, Harington says that the end of the show left Jon to “live out his life thinking about all of this trauma, and that… that’s interesting.” That comes from Entertainment Weekly, which says he “coyly emphasized” that last part.
So that means that, if this Jon Snow show goes forward, it will probably be about everyone’s favorite sullen bastard being… a sullen bastard. Hey, if it ain’t broke. It’s not like a Tyrion spin-off wouldn’t be about him being a drunk smart-ass, or that a Samwell spin-off wouldn’t be about him quietly being the smartest person in the room who nobody appreciates as much as they should.